P Posted by Sandra on December 17 2012 0 Comments McFLY, News

Yeah McFly aren’t a boyband but to be honest, lately they look like one and it seems they don’t mind to be called a boyband in interviews. Well apart from that the Smart Ladies blog did a post with the best and the worst boybands of 2012 now that the year is ending and they included McFly.

I came of age in the last great era of boybands and couldn’t be more excited they have begun to make their rounds again. 2012 was the year of the boyband and I loved every minute of it. In the ever so poetic words of AJ McLean from the Backstreet Boys, “Boybands will never f*cking die.” Thank goodness for that because I’m hoping for only more boybands in 2013!

Before we get to 2013, though, here’s my list of the best of boybands in 2012. I’ve categorized everything by the most distinguishable elements of a boyband: their hair; their clothes; the hazards of their job; over the top performances; and the perfect boyband video.

Hair

90′s boybands were all about the butt cut and spiky triangle hair. Today it’s all about the quiff (bonus points if it’s to the side instead of straight up) and the douche swoop. I’m just thankful no one sports the Justin Timberlake ramen noodle hair anymore.

Quiff

Danny Jones (McFly)

I know his hair is closer to a bouffant some days than it is a quiff, but this is my list. His hair deserves to be on a best of list considering how far it’s come from 2004.

Zayn “1 Stripe” Malik (One Direction)

I’m torn over whether or not he should be on the best of or worst of list. Best versatility, worst badger stripe.

Siva Kaneswaran (The Wanted)

There is no wind-related meteorological phenomenon that could get this guy’s hair to budge.

Joel Peat (Lawson)

Part-time quiffer, full-time hot stuff.

Most View-Obstructing Quiff of 2012: Siva Kaneswaran

Swoop

Jay McGuiness (The Wanted)
Some days Jay has awesome hair, other days I think he styles it like he styles his clothes… while inebriated.

Dougie Poynter (McFly)
Dougie reverted back to a hairstyle he had nearly a decade ago and I don’t hate it.

Louis Tomlinson (One Direction)
Louis is the douchiest of the douche swoopers, but earlier this year he dropped the swoop in favor of an Elvis bouffant.

James Maslow (Big Time Rush)
I’m just glad he let his lady hair of last year go. I wasn’t sure if James was going on tour with his bandmates or getting in his minivan to pick up his kids from soccer practice.

Least Douchiest Boyband Swoop of 2012: Dougie Poynter

Group Suits

The award show suit is essential. It should give each member a chance to express their own style while still being able to say “I belong with those boys next to me in the same color/pattern”. Unless you’re in McFly and then all of your suits match your bandmates’.

Backstreet Boys at the AMA’s
Get your sunglasses out because these are the shiniest suits in town.

The Wanted at the VMA’s
Because Nathan is in plaid, Max looks like he’s wearing cowboy boots, and Jay wore his swoopy hair with his v-neck.

McFly at every public appearance
Matching suits everywhere they go. I don’t hate it yet.

JLS as groomsmen Marvin’s wedding
Because boyband BFF’s at a wedding is precious. Bonus points because the wedding was at a palace that I have actually visited. (Also, Marvin’s wife Rochelle [of The Saturdays] announced she’s pregnant a few weeks ago and I have decided that it will be the prettiest baby ever.)

One Direction at the Brit Awards
These boys don’t go anywhere as a group without being coordinated. No one loves a color scheme more than them. And Harry Styles in a dicky bow.

Most Times Interviewed in Suits in 2012: McFly

Nakedness

It is important that at least one member of every boyband take his shirt off every chance he gets so that his fans aren’t denied his rippling abs. Any shirtless boyband member is also always sure to have the band of his designer underwear peaking out just above the top of his pants; you know just to leave something to the imagination.

Donnie Wahlberg (NKOTB)
Every night during the song “Covergirl” this man literally rips his shirt off and slings it into the audience.

All of JLS (JLS)
These boys are more about giving a sneak peek as to what they’re hiding underneath. Marvin’s wife once joked that he shows more skin on a night out than she does.

Harry Judd (McFly)
Harry was voted Attitude Magazine’s Sexiest Man of the Year which meant he had to pose on the cover in his underwear. He looked quite comfortable with it which leads me to make a few judgments I’m not quite comfortable sharing.

Ryan Fletcher (Lawson)
This boy loves a shirtless selfie.

Most Likely to be Only in Pants: Donnie Wahlberg

Hazards of the Job

Being a Boyband

Because they were put together for their gravity-defying hair and because they fit the sparkly outfits, boybands spend a lot of time defending their music. Some, like McFly, are lucky enough to be brilliant songwriters and very talented instrument players; they accepted years ago that they were going to be considered a boyband. (Like the smart fellas they are, they agreed that Backstreet Boys should be honored as the best boyband of all time instead of them. And I’m just going to ignore the fact that Tom also suggested *NSUCK.)

Because they’re new on the scene and besties with The Wanted, Lawson spend quite a bit of time trying to explain that they are not a boyband and more like The Script or Coldplay. While they do all play their own instruments and write their own music, these boys are for sure roaming around boyband land with all of that pretty hair.

Boyband Most Likely To Be Explaining that They Are Not A Boyband: Lawson

Overdramatic Performances

If no choreography is involved, I expect lots of air grabs, crotch grabbing, pelvic thrusting (NKOTB do ten in a row), blank stares into the back row, and plenty of air guitar playing. The performers that overdo this part best also have what the New Kids (I think) have dubbed the “sex face” or the “O Face”. When they get really into the song their faces look like… well…

[…]

Nathan Sykes (The Wanted)

You can see that he puts just as much into an awards show performance as he does into a soundcheck. He apparently does the same on video shoots because he said that he is always told to stop grabbing his crotch when he sings.

Tom Fletcher (McFly)

It’s clear that Nathan went to the same performing arts school as Tom since they both feel the need to sing lying flat on their backs. Bonus points for Danny singing One Direction better than One Direction.
[…]

Most Likely to Be Caught Rolling Around On The Ground: Nick Carter

Music Videos

A boyband music video is at least one of the following:

    Slick dancing (Bonus points for the addition of water or rain effects. All the points if at least two members are shirtless.)
    Uber cheesy bubblegum
    Attempt to make the guys look super macho and manly (normally in sparkles)
    A major jam session
    A big party with all of their friends who just all happen to be pretty girls

Most Glitter Used

McFly – Love Is Easy

You don’t get much more cheerful than a pink ukulele, confetti cannons, and giant dancing birds. This video is kind of a review of their careers over the past ten years which makes it easier to talk about “why they have the best fans in the world” when asked about it. You also get to see McFly in all of their matching suit glory.

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